Visiting Trips
by nonino
Summary: Minato took some time-off from his office, and went to visit some families. And he'd discover every family's different One-Shot!


**Note:** Shunshin - Body flicker. udon - A type of Japanese noodle.

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing!

**Visiting Trips**

Minato decided to visit a few families.

It was sort of like those emperors in ancient times, dressing up as commoners in order to know more about his citizens, to keep in touch with them. Well, a Hokage wasn't an emperor or anything, but he'd love to keep connected with the villagers. When Sandaime was in reign, the elder man frequently talked with the adults and played with the children, as a way to know more about them and their problems.

Frankly, it was a blessing to leave the boring office once in a while, too.

Minato prepared a small writing pad, just in case of any important matters he needed to jot down, then he was off. First destination, he drew it out of a hat. He hadn't had the real thought of whom he was going to visit first, so this was the quickest method.

The first to be picked happened to be the chief of the police department.

Minato thought he could just talk about a few things on crimes and reports of some missions. It should be a breeze. At least he hoped so.

"Ah, Hokage-sama," Mikoto slid open the door for him. "Please come in!"

Stepping into the Uchiha residence, it was roomy and...what's that noise in the background?

"**FUGAKU**!" Minato flinched at the volume of voice. "Hokage-sama's here!"

A thud and a rustle and a thump, the said head of the household appeared in the living room.

"Greetings, Yondaime-sama."

The Hokage gave him a quick once-over. From the looks of it, Minato was sure he was sleeping in broad daylight. _'So that noise was him snoring?'_

Mental note to self: Fugaku snores like a bear.

Sitting down, Mikoto provided them with tea on each side, then hurried off muttering something about lunch.

"Please," Minato assured her. "I'm not hungry. Don't bother yourself."

"Oh no no no!" Mikoto waved a hand at him, "I must get going! Fugaku gets grumpy when he's hungry, especially when he just wake up. When he's grumpy, you don't what he'd do..."

"Mikoto, quiet."

"...One time, he broke the cup in frustration of hunger, then he binges on twenty plates of sushi..."

"Mikoto."

"...There's also one time he got so hungry he chased after Itachi as though he was some kind of food! You don't know how hilarious that was, I wish I took a picture of that..."

"**Mikoto!**"

The wife finally got the cue, and ran off to the kitchen. Fugaku squeezed out an apologetic smile. "I apologize, my wife has the tendency of blabbering."

Minato nodded knowingly. Kushina had that sort of tendency sometimes, too.

"Is there anything on your mind today, Yondaime-sama?" Fugaku asked politely.

"Well, I want to hear about the-"

"**MOM!** Did you see my shurikens?!"

"-crime rates of recent months, starting-"

"**I DON'T KNOW!** Ask your father!"

"-from April. And-"

"**DAD!** Did you see my-"

"**I DID NOT! NOW SHUT UP, I'M IN A MEETING HERE!**" Fugaku roared back at the room.

Minato winced. He's grumpy alright. Fugaku turned back, still managed to muster a pleasant face. "I'm sorry, where were we, Hokage-sama?"

"As I was saying," Minato resumed, "I'd like to hear about a general crime rate for these three months."

"I see. I don't have the details on hand but I can give you a general idea-"

A fit of crying exploded in the house. Then running footsteps.

"**MOM!** Sasuke's crying!"

"**Oh, GREAT!** It's all because of you and your father **screaming!**"

_'You were screaming too, Mikoto-san,'_ Minato thought to himself. He didn't notice Fugaku was restraining himself from erupting.

The crying continued, and Fugaku slammed a palm on the desk. "For God's sake, **stop** his crying, Mikoto!"

"Excuse me, I'm cooking here, **MISTER!** Who's gonna watch the stove?!"

"**ITACHI!** Watch the stove!"

Minato arched an eyebrow. "Are you sure it's a good idea for a kid to watch the stove? He's only five, if I remembered right..."

"Don't worry," Fugaku turned back. "Itachi's quite talented."

_'What does talent have to do with watching the stove?'_ Minato had a slight frown. He'd been called talented a few times in his life, and eggs still turned black under his hands.

Fugaku paused, sensing the Hokage's displeasure. Another slam on the table. "**MIKOTO!** Tell Itachi to look after Sasuke!"

_'You can just yell without slamming the table,' _Minato watched his tea cup spilling over.

"He doens't have a **BREAST!**"

Good point.

With frustrated sigh, Fugaku tried to get back on topic. "There's a rise in petty thefts in book shops, perhaps due to-"

"Itachi! The stove! The **stove!**"

"-the increase of adult magazines and novels-"

"Mom! It's boiling!"

"-a notable one goes by the name of Icha Icha Para-"

"Turn it off!"

"Shouldn't you check on the stove?" Minato cuts him off. "It sounds like Itachi-kun doesn't know how to work around the stove yet."

"Do not worry, he'll be fine-"

"**Aaaaaahhhhhhhh!**" A shriek pierced through the room.

So after saving the kid with shunshin, Minato decided to take his leave. Opening up his pad, the Yondaime wrote down his impressions. "Lots of shouting. Parental courses strongly suggested."

Next, Minato stopped by the Hyuuga compound. He thought it might be a good idea just to start from the clans.

"Minato-sama, please come in..." A slim, sick-looking woman slid open the door.

"Please...make yourself at home."

Minato gulped. What happened to Suzuki-san? She looked like a ghost just now.

"Hello, Suzuki-san," Minato greeted the Hyuuga woman. "May I speak to Hiashi-san, or Hizashi-san?"

"They're off...important matters," Suzuki's lips mumbled shakily. "I will be attending you, Hokage-sama."

Minato felt himself sweating cold sweat. "Well, if that's the case...how have you been, Suzuki-san?"

Her shoulders shuddered as she chuckled. "Very well...two months pregnant and still alive."

_'Ah, that's right,'_ Minato remembered. Suzuki had been pregnant for the past two months.

"The sickness must have gotten to you, huh? I can ask Kushina for a few tips for you."

"No," Suzuki smiled creepily. "I'm fine...as long as I got a boy."

Minato sweat even more. _'Oh, she is expecting a boy...guess for a traditional family like the Hyuugas, she'd naturally want a male heir.'_ Even though gender really didn't make a difference in Minato's eyes, he guessed that people have different opinions on that.

"I've been drinking herbs, buying charms," She said weakly, and slowly. "I stay up late last night past a certain time just to cross the dragon bridge..."

Dragon bridge was a small bridge near the exit of Konoha. It was said a woman would be guaranteed a male child when she crossed it at a certain time and period in her pregnancy.

Kushina talked about it when she got pregnant too.

_"Screw that tale," She dismissed it haughtily. "I'm not gonna let some stupid bridge decide my kid's gender."_

"Suzuki-san, that's just a legend...superstition, even," Minato said, thinking how different Sazuki and Kushina were.

"No, it works," She smiled again. Minato was sure two rats had just died. "I've called the psychic of the nearby country to see what he says about my baby..."

"What did he say?"

"He said if someone visited on the fourth day of this week, it will be decided. If the visitor is a man, then it's a boy. If the visitor is a woman, then it's a girl."

_'Today's...Friday. The fifth day,'_ Minato mentally had a chill down his spine.

"Minato-sama," She said with a creepily sweet voice. "You should have visited me yesterday."

Gulp. "Who visited you yesterday?"

A chuckle, then it turned to hollow laughter. "Your wife, Hokage-sama."

_'Kushina?'_ "Uh oh..."

"Hehehe, now I'll never get a boy, I'll never...hahahaha..."

Before she could even think about blaming him, Minato bid farewell. He exhaled in relief. A woman's grudge was not to be taken lightly.

Pulling out the pad again, he jotted down, "Girls are just as good. Creepy superstition's gotta go, NOW."

Walking down the streets, Minato came to the Inuzaka compound. From the first step in, two dogs barked, and the third one howled. Minato realized it was a security system of sort, thus he didn't take too much mind.He kept walking down, and a woman dash to the entrance.

"Hokage-sama! Welcome!" She beamed.

"How did you know it's me?"

"Hakumaru, Amemaru, and Yukimaru told me," She grinned. "Very handy, huh?"

_'The Inuzakas knew the language shared with them and their dogs, very impressive,'_ Minato strolled with the woman, by the name of Yuumi Inuzaka. A white dog came to her.

"What is it, Yukimaru?" The dog whimpered and growled. "What, another fight?"

"Fight?"

"Yes, apparently, Hoshimaru and Umimaru are fighting again," Minato took those as names of other dogs. "Would you come with me, Hokage-sama?"

Minato wasn't planning on leaving since he just got here. He came to another street of the compound, watching a spotted dog fighting with another gray one. "Guys, stop!" Yuumi shouted, trying to separate the two big dogs. "Yukimaru, help me out!"

Minato thought of helping out too, but the woman quickly separated them. The spotted dog barked and growled.

"Hoshimaru, just because your owner left on a mission without you doesn't mean you can pick fights with others."

Wine, whimper, whimper.

"I know...don't feel sad, okay?" She patted the spotted one's head.

"What did he say?" Minato asked, even though he got the gist of it.

"He said he wanted to go with his master, and he feels useless and sad sitting here all along without him."

_'Wow, Hoshimaru said all that in three barks?'_ "I see. There must be a reason for that, right? Inuzakas don't usually go anywhere without their dogs."

"Correct, Yondaime-sama," Yuumi said. "Hoshino's master got a mission that forbids him to bring along any pets."

Angry barks from the dogs.

"What did they say?"

"They say they're not pets."

Another few howls.

"Now?"

"They say they're ninjas. Trained ones, too."

Minato nodded. "of course."

Bark, and more barks.

"They say they want to find out about the country that viewed them as pets."

"Tell them it might be a personal thing," Minato responded. "It could be that the client of the mission who doesn't like animals."

_'Wait a minute, they understand human language, right?' _Minato suddenly felt silly for saying that.

Nonetheless, Yuumi surprised him by barking back at the dogs. "They understand, but they're still kinda peeved at been called a pet, especially Hoshimaru."

"I apologize."

Yuumi barked back. More barks, and Yuumi did the same.

"Um, Yuumi-san?"

"Oh, yes, Hokage-sama?"

Before he could ask her, Umimaru barked, and she turned to answer. It looked like she just got herself engaged in a conversation with the dogs. It's good that they knew each other's language, but...

The fourth Hokage watched them barking for a while, and decided he should just leave them with their discussion. He bid farewell to Yuumi, and the latter resumed her talking.

Flipping open the pad, Minato thought about it for a moment, before writing down, "Lost in translation."

The next one was the Aburame residence. Minato only visited them briefly last time, he'd thought it was good to do so again.

Aburame Shibi was the one who came to the door. "Yondaime-sama."

Minato tipped his head to greet him. "Good afternoon, Shibi-san."

They went into the courtyard and sat at the table. The Aburame compound didn't look too busy today, Minato would think they were even taking naps.

"How's little Shino, Shibi-san?" Minato asked. Last time he saw Shino, he was just born.

"Fine, taking a nap right now," Shibi replied, pouring tea. "Sleeping is always a good way for the body to compromise with their bugs."

Minato always knew the Aburame had their bugs since their childhood. _'But in six months after they were born?'_

A few bugs flew in the air, buzzing. Honestly, the Yondaime had trouble telling them apart from flies sometimes. Even so, he could ignore a few buzzing. As long as they didn't accidentally land on his face and he didn't accidentally swap them out of reflex...

Swap.

"Daisy!" Shibi said in horror. Minato blinked, and opened his palm. A weak and wobbly bug struggled to fly again.

"Daisy, come back," Shibi put out a hand, and the bug slowly flew to his hand.

_'They can tell each bug from another? And they have names?'_ That was new to Minato. "Sorry, I didn't know."

"That's alright. Daisy just wanted to have your scents," Shibi indicated, letting the female bug crawl back into him. "That way, next time you came by, she'd know who you are."

Minato thought of resuming his talk with Shibi. He wanted to ask about the age they got heir bugs implanted.

"Shibi-san, about little Shino," The Hokage started. "When did he get his bugs?"

Another few bugs flew in the air. Minato took a mental note to self not to swap them again if they landed.

"Aburame members have their bugs implanted two months after they were born."

"I see." One bug landed on Minato's cheek.

"Two months are enough for the body to get used to this world-"

Another bug landed on his forehead.

"-thus, it is now stable enough for the bugs to be implanted," Shibi said swiftly. "We want to do it when the children are still young. They will forget about the pain that way."

"It was that painful to have the bugs?"

"Well yes, at first when they were trying to get used to your body," Shibi sipped his tea. "But as I said, they won't remember the pain after they grow up. When they realize it, their bugs are already a part of them."

Shibi lifted his head. If he hadn't had his lenses on, he'd looked surprised.

"My, my. Looks like the bugs like you, Yondaime-sama."

Right now, Minato's face was covered with a few dozen female bugs, trying to sniff out of him. The Hokage didn't even want to open his mouth lest the bugs went in. So he resorted to sign language. He pointed at his face, and then pointed back at Shibi.

_'Call them back, please,'_ Minato thought desperately. The bugs were really itching him.

"Some of them are mine, but some aren't," Shibi replied. "I think the other members of the household are trying to know you by sending out their bugs."

Minato frowned. So he couldn't get them off?

With a hand, a few bugs flew back to Shibi. "Looks like the only way is to call out the other members."

Shibi went and let out the other members, room by room. Most of them were women of the household, including Shibi's own wife.

"My bugs got the scents already," Shibi said. "You don't have to sent out yours."

"Well, he's the Hokage," The wife pouted through her lenses. "It's always good to know a new scent."

The bugs were cleared from his face, but Minato could still feel a strange aura like someone were staring at him with heart-shaped eyes.

Sweat sliding down. Kushina always told him he was popular among the ladies.

_"But if you ever let me catch you with another woman," An evil glint sparked in Kushina's eyes. "Then you __**die**__, Namikaze."_

And Minato believed in his wife with his whole heart. Kushina could deal serious damage when she was mad, it was hard to handle even for a Hokage...

Not wanting to hear the bickering from Shibi and his wife, Minato bid farewell. Staring at the blank page, Minato scribbled down, "Area 51, remember Kushina's wrath."

It was in the evening when he came out of the Aburame compound. Minato decided to go home for the day.

Kushina, already with a bulging belly, stood by the kitchen cooking supper. Hearing the door open, she went to the living room.

"Something smells good," Minato said in delight. "What are you cooking?"

"Ah, beef udon," Kushina answered. "What, expecting ramen?"

"Oh no, udon's fine," Minato gave his wife a light kiss on the forehead. "If it's your cooking, then anything's good."

A grin from the Uzumaki. "So...I heard you went to visit a few villagers. How was it?"

Sitting down, Minato stretched. "Ah, it was alright. But," He smiled at her. "I guess no family beats my own."

Kushina chuckled. "You said it. I'll get the noodles."

Knocks were heard on the door. Who could have come right now?

"I'll go get it."

Kushina went off for the door, while Minato took out his pad to put it away. An Aburame bug came flying out of his pocket.

"Sorry, Kushina-san," A young woman at the door said. "My bug is sill on Hokage-sama..."

Uh oh.

The front door clicked shut, Kushina turned with a sickening sweet smile. "Minato...did you say you had a good time on your visits?"

"Yeah, and one of them was the Aburame..."

"Well then," Kushina's smile just turned a tad bit scarier. "Why don't you tell me _all_ about it?"

Minato gulped loud and hard. If he had his pen right now, he'd probably jot down...

"Run for your life."

FIN.

**A/N:** Lol, just a random thing inspired by a few movies portraying different families. Honestly, I don't think Kushina will get jealous over such a little thing, but I was running out of ideas for my ending. xDD;; And, Yondaime is quite good-looking too, so I thought he'd at least attract a few pursuers...

Edit: Can't believe I misspelled udon!! It's corrected now.

Well, 'tis my first story, and I hope it's okay and you guys had fun reading it! x3


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